Crock is Armed! Defending Against Communists and Fascists (and Pirates)

I've been getting several calls regarding the signs on the main entrance to Corporate Office IV and I thought I would take some time to clear up any doubt or confusion.

The sign reads: Fire Arms are Prohibited in a Communist or Fascist Society, not in this building.

People have taken this to mean different things. Some think it means that "Fire Arms are prohibited in a Communist or Fascist Society other than the Communist or Fascist Society housed within this building". This interpretation is near to the truth (except the actual truth is not really true because of the fact that I just made up the entire story, but in the interest of fictional purposes we shall operate under the premise that the made up truth is the actual truth.) I say it's near to the truth because it, at least, leaves the interpreter with the conclusion that "Fire Arms are allowed in this building", which is in fact the made up truth. The problem with this is that there is no Communist or Fascist Society housed within this building. Therefore these people are missing the point.

Others have somehow inserted the word "allowed" between the words "not" and "in". This has lead to two more interpretations. The first, that Fire Arms are not allowed in this building, which is false. Secondly, that communist or fascist societies are not allowed in this building, therefore Fire Arms are not prohibited. Do you follow? This of course, gets the desired result in that the real made up true intention of the sign remains in tact because the reader has understood that Fire Arms are allowed, and there is no Communist or Fascist Society within this building. Yet the overall point has whizzed over their head.

A couple of people thought that the sign was multiple choice question. Fire Arms are prohibited a) in a Communist Society, b) in a Fascist Society, or c) not in this building. The problem here is, the correct and fictitious true answer is not available. We would need to add d) all of the above. Of course this assumes that you can decipher the meaning of the sentence "Fire Arms are Prohibited not in this building". It's sort of an old world way of speaking, as in "Fear not the Reaper" or "Ask not what your country can do for you".

One guy from third shift thought it meant that it was acceptable to enter the building with his arms on fire. He also added "What's a Commonish or Facest Saucity?"

There were a couple of people who decoded the actual true (although actually false*) meaning and intent of the sign. It is a political statement. It is meant to send a message to all who enter that says: This is America, a Free Nation (for the time being) where individuals still have the right to exercise the right granted in the Second Amendment. A nation in which any of us at any given moment might be "packin' heat". A nation where criminals think twice about conducting their criminalistic type acts for fear of the long arm of justice striking them down swiftly and instantly in the form of a bullet from an unknown armed citizen......and the same applies in this building."

* Allow me to be clear. The truth is not false. The meaning and intent of the sign is true, but the sign does not actually exist. The entire story is false, meaning: fiction, not real. Thus the use of the word "false" parenthetically after the word "true". Yet another paradox.