We're not all about the profits here at Crock, Inc. We do believe in being good stewards of the earth. We, like you, are very concerned with the health of the environment and the well-being of our animal friends with whom we share our planet.
For the past seven years our research and destruction team has been researching the destruction of armadillo along Missouri roadways. Their findings may surprise you. Well, let's be honest. The bulk of you may be surprised to learn that there are armadillos to destroy along Missouri roadways. I was shocked too.
It is true. The mid-western roadways of the central portion of eastern Missouri do indeed run through armadillo territory. No one can say for certain which came first. Some evidence suggests that these lovable armored creatures may have migrated here after the industrial revolution of the central portion of eastern Missouri (1992). At any rate, during the seven year study, the frequency of armadillo road kill incidents increased from 4 in 2001 to more than 400 in 2008. That's like a million percent increase or something.
The evidence overwhelmingly points to a healthy and thriving population of armadillos in this region. Though it may also simultaneously suggest too yet as well that these creatures suck at crossing the road, it nevertheless proves that the armadillo population is on the rise.
Or does it mean that there is more traffic now? Or does it mean that evil operatives have been targeting these animals with their automobiles? The study didn't really take it into account. Actually, we ended the study after one Crock researcher and destructor made a very valid point.
He asked, "Over the past seven years, how many Woolly Mammoth carcasses have been discovered slain by vehicles along the mid-western roadways of the central portion of eastern Missouri?"
Of course, the answer is; none. He continued, "If we found a fresh woolly mammoth road kill today in this area, wouldn't it indicate that the woolly mammoth population must have been greater than we thought prior to the road kill?"
Considering that we were 100% certain that there were zero mammoth left, we had to agree. Study complete.
What did we learn? If we all pitch in and help, we truly can make a difference. The planet needs you. You can start today. Please join Crock, Inc. in conjunction with The National Society of Crazies to help, not just armadillos, but squirrels, opossum, peacock, ostrich, and even woolly mammoth co-exist and thrive in a world of fast-moving automobiles. Here's how you can help:
When you're out driving around in your SUV for no good reason, look for opportunities. Each time you see an animal cross the road, consider speeding up and hitting the creature. Imagine the possibilities? If you hit enough of a certain species, you will (as proven by our seven year study) increase the known population of that particular species. Remember, if you run down just one woolly mammoth, you will have single-handedly brought back these majestic and docile mammals from extinction.
Please visit The NSC website for more information.
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