5(10) Things You Should Never Run With

A Public Service Announcement.

Why anyone would want to run is beyond me, but I know some folks rather enjoy it.  Here is some advice for those people.  Some things to consider.  A reminder that safety is the key to safety.  Being safe is way less dangerous than being dangerous.  You runners know this.  That's why you'll print the list below and read it while you run down the street. You'll text it to your running buddies who will read it while they run.  You'll tweet it while you drive to the spot where you will ultimately begin your run.  You'll wear your running helmet?  That's a question.  Do you even own a running helmet?  Wow!  You need this more than I thought.  In a moment,  I will provide a list of 5(10) things that you shouldn't run with, off the top of my head. But first, I think I speak for all of us here at Crock Inc. when I say "those running pants are the exact right size for you".  

Ok.  The list.  Off the top of my head. This is so easy.  Brains needed = none.

#1 Scissors

#2 Pencils

#3 Broadswords

#4 That idea you had last night after the bottle of bourbon

#5 A tiny baby

#6 The wrong crowd

#7 The Devil

#8 Large floppy breasts

#9 Polio

#10 Cops chasing you

#16 A blindfold

#22 Conviction

There! That's 5(10)(22)(12) things you shouldn't run with.  I bet that the armies of medieval times lost at least 30% of their eyes simply by running with those sharp weapons.  You'll never see a barber run, ever.  4, 5, 6, and 10 above are all related and I have witnessed these simultaneously.  I don't want to talk about it.  Van Halen was guilty of #7 and look what happened to them.  I could write another entire post on things you shouldn't do while wearing a blindfold.  This whole thing makes me realize that abstinence is the only way to assure safety.    

Related post: http://crockinc.blogspot.com/2012/11/how-to-avoid-stabbing-yourself-with.html?m=1