Predicament To Be Figured Out #112367
Good afternight dear patrons and staff. We have another predicament that we need to figure out. Your help was much appreciated on #112366 and Flanksham now has his fingers surgically reattached and he can almost swallow solid foods again.
This time, I regret to say, I have been studying the competition. It appears that it is commonly suggested and advised for blog posts to be concise and not to be overly wordy or longwinded. What in Blue Blazes are we supposed to do now?
Crock, Inc. has always found ways to simultaneously worship and butcher the American language. We have always seen the value of driving the point home by making sure you understand what we're getting at (or confusing you to the point where you have to read it many times over, and therefore memorizing it). Sometimes it is necessary to be redundant and repeat ourselves over and over using different words from time-to-time or once in a while, whichever comes first. We know that our readers can appreciate the fact that we say these things, sometimes twice or six times in the same sentence, add a comma, then say them again, while knowing full well that adding a comma means that we do not have to start a new sentence but rather let the original one keep going even though most grammatical experts would say it should have stopped by now but it didn't, then labelling it a "run on" sentence. (I hate that). We also know that, in many cases, short sentences may be more direct and to the point. Get it? Good. We'll use plenty of those too. (Have you noticed that we are rather fond of parenthetical comments as well?)
Basically, we need to know if you will stand behind us as we stand our ground. We will continue to blog "improperly" no matter how many times we're fined and arrested. Stand by us brothers and sisters. Your support is needed now.
3 comments:
I am going to keep this short. Simply because since the failure of #112366 which by the way it is still hard to swallow, thanks for the concern(sarcasm). Also I thought you were going to chip in on the medical bills, it is a little hard to pay my bills since I had to spend time in jail thanks to Sharon, who by the way still has a job??
You forgot to mention in your blog that you were eating at Steak and Shake, and apparently you ordered a bean crock when you called Sharon from my phone which the feds then traced to me, which then also lead to a discovery of all the security clearances I had been filing for you and which ended back in my desk mysteriously, and then that whole deal about form # htx37 which lead to hours of questioning and new petitions being filed blah blah and subsiquently I got to go down alone. Thanks buddy.
How did I lose my fingers, well that was my own fault but I am sure you had something to do with it too.
Anyway all that aside it's good to know you got the company up and running again, and didnt bother calling me or emailing me, I been out of jail 6 months and you never called. What's up with that??
I hope you allow me to freelance once in a while. I would love to add my colorful taste of the world and share my insights of various goings on. I can also add serious discussion to an otherwise not serious subject. Or I can just go on and on for hours with no regard to even understanding what I type. I can really be serious, maybe not but it sounds good.
No seriously it's good to know that Crock can now enter into people's lives again with no regard or concern. Especially now that things are finally official again and I guess Sharon is thankful to have a job. Which by the way reminds me I never got paid, I dont know what happened if the check got lost in the mail or maybe it never got mailed. Did you say Sharon was working in the mail room?
I am coming over there.
And I thought my life had lost meaning, but it was only my meaning that had lost it's life.
Hey Flanksham! We're still waiting for you to submit the completed form #HXT37 for proper processing.
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